I have a great app called “Dreamdays” that keeps track of important dates. So I have the day that Jay left for Australia and the day he plans on visiting AND we are past the halfway mark! Granted, we are JUST past the halfway point but it really puts things into perspective. I think a lot of the reason that this LDR is working well for us is because we take the time to look at our own situation from different perspectives.
When other people hear about our relationship a lot of them immediately focus on the challenge of it. Although an LDR can be very difficult, there are several other great things that can come from one. What sets Jay and I apart from some other couples is that we can see past the distance. We don’t dwell on what challenges we face. Instead, we put a positive spin on things. Here is a short list of some of those positive aspects of an LDR:
1. Distance allows you to be your own people. Sometimes it can be hard to battle between hanging out with friends and being with your SO. Maybe you want to go to a party, but they don’t want to…Or what if you have plans and they stay home? This can sometimes spark silly fights. In an LDR you can do what you want. So if I want to go to the movies after work, I can do that. And if Jay wants to do a spur of the moment bike ride, he can do that too! Distance makes it easier to follow your own path. You can be a little more spontaneous and really get to know yourself while still maintaining an amazing relationship.
2. An LDR inspires creativity. You are forced to think outside the box in order to communicate. It can be really fun to discover new date ideas or ways to celebrate holidays and birthdays. It’s hard to be apart for special days, but the memories of your first Skype birthday will stay with you forever. You will always have those quirky and personal moments to share with each other.
3. LDRs build your excitement. Remember when you were younger and got to stay up until midnight on New Year’s Ever for the first time? What about how excited you got the whole month of December because Santa was coming soon? An LDR gives you a very similar type of excitement! When you finally plan a visit to see one another it creates the same anticipation. All of your visits become that long-awaited Christmas present. And the satisfaction when you get to open it is incomparable to anything.
4. If you can survive it, you know your relationship is worth it. For some people, it can be hard to see whether or not the relationship they’re in will last for a while. To no fault of their own, sometimes two people just don’t work well together. Sometimes you need someone else (a friend or family member) to tell you they might not be “the one.” And sometimes you just don’t see the two of you drifting apart. An LDR can help with that. By adding the physical separation, you really get to look at all aspects of your relationship. The effort you put into an LDR and the connection you share together is proof of your wonderful relationship. If you have a successful LDR, than you can be sure that you and your partner have something special.
5. There is no better feeling than when you shorten the distance. Once you close the gap, there is no better feeling. You are both filled with love and achievement because you survived something most people would never even consider…you survived a LDR. Against all odds and everyone else’s opposing views, you entered one of the most challenging types of relationship. You embraced it, you had fun with it, and you survived it.
So next time you or a friend is thinking about trying a LDR, focus on the positive aspects. For some people, an LDR may be the worst thing to try but, for others, it could really be the force that pulls you closer together. So take a step back and look at the situation from all points of view….gain a little perspective.