People in LDRs are by far the strongest people I have ever met in life. The mental and emotional challenges LDR couples face everyday far outweighs the challenges of people in ordinary relationships.
Here are my top 10 reasons why people in LDRs are some of the strongest people out there and why others should be careful who they’re judging
They willingly accept it. A relationship where you can’t easily visit your SO is challenging, but everyone in a LDR accepts it from the start. They know that they may not see each other for months or even years, but they are willing to live with that if it means they can be together.
They wait for weeks just to get a letter. For those of us in an international LDR it can take a really long time for mail to get delivered. So if we’re expecting a letter or a card from our SO we better wait another 2 weeks to get it! It’s almost like time freezes within the relationship while the rest of the world keeps going about their business.
Speaking of time…they deal with the dreaded TIME DIFFERENCES. Jay and I recently upgraded(?) from a 12-16 hour time difference (depending on DST) to a currently 6 hour time difference. Sounds so much better, right? WRONG. Regardless of how small the difference, LDR couples still need to make sacrifices. They stay up late, wake up early, and sometimes skip out on other activities to talk to each other. Sometimes it’s hard enough for me to remember what day it is, but now I have to know what time and day it is for Jay too? Talk about confusing! It’s like your relationship is constantly jet-lagged…
They are masters of compromising and making sacrifices. Every once in a while a LDR couple may be faced with a scheduling dilemma. We’re supposed to Skype, but my friends want to go to the movies….Or, it’s time to call you but I lost track of time and I’m still at dinner. How do you choose between friends and your SO? Family and your SO? Work and your SO? It takes a strong person to choose between people and LDR couples are put on the spot for decisions like this all the time
Nothing is certain. Of course this is true with all relationships, but even more so with a LDR. Think your SO is coming to visit in September? Whoops, looks like he just got a hernia and needs surgery. Expecting to Skype at 7? Oh no, he fell asleep!Something like missing a Skype call may seem like no big deal to a “normal” couple, but for a LDR couple it can really make of break the day. People in LDRs really learn that nothing is in their control. They don’t learn to expect disappointment, but they sure know how to deal with it!
They survive the physical absence. It’s no surprise that people in LDRs go without physically touching or seeing their SO for months at a time. It might sound like it’s “not so bad” but it can be really saddening when you come home with exciting news and all you want is a congratulatory smile and hug. And it’s even worse when you’ve had a bad day. Snuggling a computer or your phone doesn’t feel quite the same as having your SO there to snuggle you. If you’re in a LDR you have to deal with the physical absence of your SO and you have to be very mentally and emotionally strong during times like these.
Visits are short, but time apart is lengthy. Yaaaaaaaaaay, you’re finally going to see your SO!!!!! But can a 2-week long visit really make up for the 6 months you went without seeing each other? Of course, every visit in a LDR is amazing because LDR couples don’t take them for granted! But these visits are usually pretty short because people can’t just leave work for months at a time.
Their bank accounts are quite empty. Think you have it bad paying all of your bills with your low-salaried job? How about adding international mail and plane tickets to your list of expenses. LDR couples really learn to save money just so they can see each other. I know my net worth is a lot smaller than it should be, but visiting Australia to see Jay was definitely worth it! Most LDR couples are like me…they learn to live with little money because once they get enough they travel to see each other.
They deal with the doubters. It can be incredibly difficult to be in a LDR, but it’s even harder when the people who usually support you are not a fan of your relationship. Most people in a LDR have to fight against other people’s negative words of advice and still have a positive outlook on their relationship. It can be very stressful and draining for them, especially if they don’t have anyone to turn to for support.
They don’t let their own fears overtake them. LDRs are scary! In order for one to be successful, there has to be a lot of trust. LDR couples put so much faith and trust into their SO and they don’t let the common LDR fears overwhelm them. Every once in a while they may have a “what if he cheats” or a “what if she stops loving me” moment but, for the most part, LDR couples rise above these fears.
Those are just 10 of the reasons that people in LDRs have incredible self-strength. It takes a very unique person to try a LDR and an even more special person to thrive in a LDR. These relationships are far from easy, but these couples are extremely tough and some even make it look easy! The strength of these LDR couples is an inspiring and beautiful thing.
Inspired by this LDR Writing Prompt: Self Strength