There is a lot of controversy surrounding LDRs and this post certainly won’t help relieve that. But it will give you a glimpse of the debate revolving around LDRs. There are pros and cons to every relationship, and LDRs are certainly no exception. But the funny thing about positives and negatives in a LDR is that they often stem from the same characteristic.
Here’s a quick glance at the three “T” traits of a LDR:
Con: You may find yourself extremely worried when you start your LDR. What if he finds someone he likes better than me? What if she cheats? How will I know if they’re flirting with other people? The questions will swarm your mind until you feel sick. Even the smallest doubt will consume your thoughts.
Pro: You will definitely learn a lot more about trust in a LDR. If you can fully trust each other your LDR will be successful. Not only that, but being able to trust your SO will help you relax a little bit more in life. I had some doubt in the beginning, but once I eliminated it I felt a huge weight get lifted from me. I’m less stressed and feel freer than I did before.
Con: The different time zones can throw your routine into a whirlwind. Between school, work, social obligations, and talking with your SO there may not be enough time for you to accomplish what you want to during the day. You’ll have to make some sacrifices if you want to balance all of these in your life.
Pro: If you do happen to get some free time, you won’t have to worry about what your SO wants to do, you can make that decision for yourself. Want to go grab a drink with friends? Do it. Rather stay home and lounge? Nobody will care! Not having your SO around might make free time more scarce, but you can spend it exactly how you like it.
Con: If you want to see each other you’re going to have to travel. Traveling costs money…and lots of it! You’ll also need to make sure you have enough vacation days off of work for a substantial trip because you probably won’t have enough money to afford multiple trips per year. So much for that savings account….
Pro: You get to travel the world. How awesome is that?! Being in a LDR is basically an excuse to see places you haven’t seen before and experience different cultures. You even get a free tour guide. 🙂 I would have never thought to go to Australia if Jay didn’t live there and I’m so glad I was given that excuse!
So what does this mean?!
With every moment in life you’ll be faced with a decision. Some are more difficult than others so it’s important to examine all sides before making a choice. The three T’s are just a snapshot of the debate over LDRs. There are several other positive aspects of a LDR and many other negatives as well. From what I’ve experienced though, it seems like there is a good balance between the two. No side really outweighs the other. LDRs are given too much flak and you should be aware that there are some positives that come from the seemingly negative situation.
Weigh your options and make your own decision. Don’t let society make it for you.