Visiting your SO can be the most exciting event of the year. You save up money for months for your plane ticket and both of you spend weeks planning the places you’ll visit together once there. Even if everything doesn’t go as planned along the way the overwhelming excitement will overpower any negative emotions before you get there. You spend an amazing visit together and for a brief time you can’t remember what life is like without each other. But then it’s time to go home.
The hardest thing for me is not waiting to see Jay, but adjusting to my regular routine once our visit is over. Sure, I have a lot going well for me in life and I am always a little happy to come back home, but the abrupt lack of companionship leaves me feeling lost and confused here. LDR visits are great, but they don’t come without a cost (and I’m not talking about money). You go from the pure bliss of a visit to a very sudden feeling of loneliness and emptiness.
I came back less than a week ago and started back at work the morning after I arrived home. After discussing my trip with some co-workers I tried to settle back into my groove, but my mind was empty. I couldn’t focus on any tasks at work and I felt like a piece of me was missing. In 24 hours I had gone from exploring the cities of Europe with Jay to sitting in a semi-isolated cubicle staring blankly at my computer screen. It’s as if my “real life” self is in a different dimension than my vacationing self and somewhere along the transition back to real life I hit a glitch that’s stopping me from readjusting to everything here.
Inability to Readjust.
These are only a few of the paralyzing effects of LDR visits. I usually try to emphasize the positive aspects of LDRs, but I think this is a really important subject to address because visits are always looked an as such positive events. It’s important to be aware of the likelihood that you’ll be in a downward spiral by the time you reach home.
Try and stay positive, ease back into your regular routine, and surround yourself with friendly faces so you can start being the awesome self you abandoned for a few weeks.